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Writer's pictureJohn Provost

Learning from regrets.

Updated: Apr 28, 2023

"Regret- The emotion of wishing one had made a different decision in the past, because the consequences of the decision were unfavorable. A feeling of sadness, repentance, or disappointment over something that has happened or been done."


Dilemma.

I recently had the chance to talk with someone about their experiences skiing in Utah, walking through crowded streets in Iraq, and experiencing some of “the best burgers ever created on the east coast of the United States.” He had biked from one coast to the other, often sleeping like a “homeless person” with the occasional hotel stay in an effort to conserve his money. These stories were told with such enthusiasm that I could tell he wouldn’t have changed a thing and would do it again in a heartbeat. He had no regrets.


It made me examine some things in the past where choices were presented and decisions had to be made. Did I make the right ones? No one ever truly knows if the decision made was ever the “right one”, but I have come to appreciate that any decision made that leaves someone not regretting it, is usually the “right one” for them.


Interviews of patients in palliative care have revealed many regrets and things or actions they wish they had did when given the opportunity but didn’t. These regrets have been collected into a list intended to inspire a call to action for people to live THEIR lives. This list (The Five Regrets of the Dying) represent the most common regrets people had and Are as follows:


1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard.


3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

4. I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.


5. I wish that I had let myself be happier.


Realization.

It was this interaction that reminded me of the regrets of the dying list and made me think- what do I really want to do? Am I contributing to doing what I want to do? (And if not why not? What’s holding me back?”

Taking inspiration from the first regret- having the courage to live life true to oneself, what tiny steps will you be taking to start living life by YOUR rules if you aren’t doing so already?

I’ll be taking this journey of self-discovery and growth in trying to live the life that resonates with my truth and encourage others to come along with me on his journey. Feel free to share your experiences and I’ll look forward to sharing a lot more with you as new life lessons are learned.

Here's to the journey and our first steps!

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